When we hope for something, when we look forward to its happening....that doesn't mean that it will happen. The only assurance of anticipation is that one day we will know whether what we anticipated happened or not. And that is beautiful.
It's beautiful because it gives weight to our choice to keep anticipating. If what we looked forward to always happened, what choice would there be in anticipating? Anticipation would become simply a knee-jerk reaction to future events, an exercise more in delay than patience.
But when what we anticipate doesn't happen, when it happens differently than what we hoped for, and yet we still choose to anticipate and hope...it speaks to something greater than ourselves. To keep anticipating, keep hoping means that we allow ourselves to be disappointed by our anticipations not coming true. We allow ourselves to feel the sting of unfilled hopes - be it a tiny laceration or a devastating broken heart.
And then we keep hoping, keep anticipating, keep looking forward to what's ahead even as we enjoy the present for what it is.
Why? Why would anyone choose to hope when they know that their hopes might not come true? When they know that anticipation only magnifies the disappointment of unfilled dreams?
I can't answer for everyone, nor can I even answer fully for me. But if you'll allow me to, I'll give you a partial answer for myself.
Anticipation in the aftermath of disappointment is a way for me to remind myself that life isn't about me, that my life isn't my own. I believe in a God who loves always and in all ways. There's not another foot, waiting to drop and ruin my joy. Sure, life won't be the trouble free, painless existence that I find myself longing for. God told me that there would be heartache, trouble, adversity in this world. But He also said that He has overcome the world. And it is His victory over pain and trouble that gives me courage to keep hoping.
He is writing a story I keep trying to mess up. Not intentionally but I'm no where near the story writer He is despite my disillusions and continued attempts to write my own story. For me to hope, to anticipate is to embrace the Author of my life and the story that He is writing. I might (er, will) get some of the details wrong when I anticipate. I will feel the sting of anticipations unfilled again and again. But I keep anticipating because I know Who is writing my story and I trust Him.